14 Cocktail Names That Could Probably Use A Rebrand

Sipping on a cocktail as you relax and unwind with friends can be a very enjoyable experience. The mix of different flavors, such as tequila infused with fruit, rum, and pineapple juice, or whiskey and lemon juice, can enhance your overall drinking experience. If you regularly order cocktails or look over the drink menu when you're out at a bar or restaurant, then you know some have rather strange names.

While originality is a good thing, a few cocktail names seem well overdue for a rebrand. Some of these names have a history that traces back decades, while others have been introduced more recently. Regardless of their history, it may be time to reevaluate some crude or offensive cocktail names, ones that make the concoction sound utterly disgusting, or ones that are too much of a mouthful to remember. Whether you'll be mixing your own cocktails or ordering from a favorite bartender, we think the cocktails listed below could use alternative names.

When you hear the words fuzzy navel, what do you think about? Be honest. Anatomically, the navel is the area where the umbilical cord once attached to our stomachs, more commonly called the belly button. Fuzzy can be used to refer to stubble, hair, or dirt. So, we won't fault you if your first thought was of a hairy belly button.

Despite what its name may have you believe, a Fuzzy Navel cocktail has nothing to do with belly buttons or hair. Instead, fuzzy refers to the peach schnapps in the ingredient list. Peaches have fuzz, after all. And navel is referencing the species of orange used — usually grown in winter . However, while the name may make sense after some further inspection, the fact that so many people hear it and think of something completely different — and rather gross — means that it might be time to give a Fuzzy Navel cocktail a new name. If you want to try this cocktail at home to help you think of a more suitable name, just combine equal parts peach schnapps and fresh-squeezed orange juice.

If you were out at a bar with a friend, and they ordered you a Duck Fart shot, you'd probably start questioning both their intentions and your decision to be friends with them. This cocktail has a truly disgusting name that is certain to turn off many would-be drinkers.

The shot features three distinct layers. The base layer consists of ½ an ounce of Kahlúa coffee liqueur. The middle layer features ½ an ounce of Bailey's Irish Cream. And finally, ½ an ounce of Crown Royal blended Canadian whiskey finishes off the shot. When you see the finished product, you may be able to figure out why this shot, which originated in Alaska, was given its name. The top layer is yellow, much like the bill of a duck. The middle is tan, similar to the color of a duck's body. And, the bottom layer is dark brown — bet you can figure out what this layer resembles. While there may be sound reasoning behind the naming of this shot, it just sounds too gross, and many people will end up missing out on the interesting blend of Kahlúa, Bailey's Irish Cream, and Whiskey.

If you've never heard of a Philadelphia Fish House Punch, it is an alcoholic drink served, you guessed it, punch-style. The recipe combines rum, cognac, peach brandy, black tea, lemon juice, sugar, and lemons for a boozy punch perfect for serving at large gatherings. The cocktail has an interesting history. As you can probably guess, it originated in Philadelphia, but the rest of its origins may not be so easy to ascertain based on the name. Before the Revolutionary War, the drink was created by colonial Americans who were rebelling against English control. The group started the Schuylkill Fishing Company and declared they were sovereign from British rule and citizens of their new state.

While the history of this cocktail is interesting and helps you understand where the Fish House in the name came from, it requires a bit too much explanation for those who are just looking for a new drink to try. Plus, with the Fish House in the title, some may be confused and assume that the cocktail is only to be enjoyed in specific locations or under certain circumstances. Philadelphia Fish House Punch is a mouthful to say. Try yelling it out to a bartender without slurring your words; we bet you can't do it.

While the name Alabama Slammer does have a certain ring to it, hearing the word slammer may bring visions of jail to your mind. Even though the cocktails name doesn't appear to have anything to do with prison,  you're might start thinking about crime and punishment as you sip. This is not something you want to be focused on when you're out trying to have a good (but safe) time with your friends. The name of this cocktail doesn't really have anything to do with a slammer, AKA jail. There aren't a lot of details surrounding its history, but it was first created around the 1970s near The University of Alabama. The slammer in the name references the fact that it was originally served as a shot, not a full cocktail.

The name is also a bit misleading, as you may assume a drink with a name that sounds like prison should be bitter or unappetizing. However, an Alabama Slammer has a fruity flavor thanks to the orange juice in its ingredient list. The other key ingredients in this cocktail include sloe gin, amaretto, and, of course, Southern Comfort. With this ingredient list, an Alabama Slammer will probably get more likes and tries if it is marketed under a new name.

Picture this: You and your friends are planning a night out on the town. Everyone is listing what they want to do — go to a fine dining restaurant, catch a show or a movie, visit a new bar, etc. Next, one of your friends chimes in that you should all drink a Rusty Nail. And, just like that, your dreams of a nice night out seem far less possible. A Rusty Nail is made with scotch and Drambuie. Its exact history isn't completely clear, but the first appearance of the cocktail seems to have been in 1937, right around the time of the British Industries Fair trade show, and was popular for decades, especially in the '60s and '70s.

The combination of the scotch and Drambuie gives this cocktail a yellowish-brown color, which is where the name came from. However, there is something unappetizing about drinking a rust-colored cocktail. You don't see Rusty Nails on bar menus as often today as you did several years ago but perhaps a rebrand will bring this once-popular cocktail back to life.

Damn the Weather sounds more like something you'd say when rain ruins your outdoor plans rather than what you'd ask for at the bar. But, believe it or not, this is a cocktail. The cocktail was created during the Prohibition era and is made with vermouth, gin, Curaçao, and orange juice. It is shaken with ice (remember the key difference between shaking cocktails wet and dry is whether you use ice), strained, and served in a chilled glass.

While the ingredients in this cocktail may sound intriguing, the name leaves a lot to be desired because it doesn't indicate what is inside the drink. But, the color of this cocktail is yellow (or sometimes orange), indicating bright sun, or sunset, so who would want to damn a bright sunny day or nice sunset? So, it seems the cocktail has nothing to do with the weather plus it can be enjoyed on hot or cold days. Perhaps some creative rebranding can bring this 100-year-old drink back into circulation. There's got to be a more descriptive name that captures the true essence of this drink. Try making one at home and think about what you would call it.

While you may not have heard of many of the cocktails on this list, you've almost certainly heard of a Bloody Mary, even if you've never tried one before. While the words may slide off your tongue, especially if you frequently go to brunch, when you stop and think about the name of this cocktail, it starts seeming less and less appealing. Bloody Marys are traditionally served at brunch because they are seen as the perfect hangover cure.

The cocktail has a long ingredient list, which includes tomato juice, Tabasco sauce, Worcestershire sauce, horseradish, vodka, and more. These ingredients give it a red color, which helps explain the blood reference in the title. Many believe its name is tied to Queen Mary I of England. Mary Tudor, as she was known, ordered Protestant believers in the Kingdom to be killed in the 16th century. This gave her the nickname of Bloody Mary. Still, others believe it was invented in Paris by bartender Pete Petiot in 1921 at Harry's New York Bar and originally called a Bucket of Blood. However it began, a rebrand is necessary. Drinking blood (real or not) is unappealing at best, but especially if you're trying to quell a hangover. 

Angry Balls is yet another cocktail with a rather obscene and inappropriate name. That alone may be enough to deter some from ordering the drink. Others may not be bothered so much by the obscenity but may feel a bit uncomfortable thinking about the cocktail's name and the pain it could mean for them. As it turns out, this cocktail's name comes from one of the key ingredients: Fireball cinnamon whiskey. You also need Angry Orchard or another hard cider to make it.

While hearing that Fireball cinnamon whiskey is one of the primary ingredients in the cocktail may help you understand where its name came from, it doesn't help others who don't know the backstory. Do you really want to yell, "I'd like an Angry Balls!" across the bar? Or, even worse, what if you have to ask the bartender to remake the cocktail. What are you going to say? "There's something wrong with my Angry Balls?" You're guaranteed to get some weird looks for that. Probably best to think of a new name for this cocktail.

If a cocktail earned its name because it made someone hit themselves against the wall, would you be eager to order it? Probably not. Well, that's one of the theories behind the name of the Harvey Wallbanger cocktail. Many believe it was named after a man called Harvey sometime during the 1950s or 1960s. Harvey was a surfer from California who reportedly banged the walls when drinking it. From the sounds of it, it might make you go a bit too far.

Regardless of this history behind this drink's name, as you learn more about what a Harvey Wallbanger is, you might want to try it. The cocktail adds a Galliano float — a sweet, vanilla-flavored liqueur — over a Screwdriver. As a refresher, a Screwdriver is a simple cocktail made with vodka and orange juice. The addition of the vanilla liqueur adds a touch of sweetness to the mix. This simple, yet delicious, cocktail definitely deserves a more fitting — and less frightening — name.

Ah, the Alien Brain Hemorrhage shot. If the sound of the name alone is stopping you from ordering one of these, we understand. While the shot does have a weird look — that one could confuse for a hemorrhaging brain — who will want to drink one? The shot is made using Peach Schnapps, Bailey's Irish Cream, Blue Curaçao, and grenadine, and when the ingredients are combined in the correct order, the colors swirl in such a way that gives the shot a highly unappealing 3D look.

While this shot is traditionally served around Halloween or other spooky events, but it's interesting taste could be enjoyed year-round — as long as it is given a new name. For example, it looks more like the Eagle Nebula way out in deep space. Who wouldn't want to imagine drinking in thousands of stars as they talk about their day at the office? The red, white(ish), and blue colors could make it a contender for Fourth of July celebrations, but we doubt anyone will want to serve something called (and looking like) an Alien Brain Hemorrhage as they commemorate the country's independence.

Who wants to order a drink called a Suffering Bastard? The name makes you think you'll be in instant pain after finishing the cocktail. However, the drink was actually created to cure hangovers and help "suffering bastards" find relief from the pain of drinking too much the night before. It was first concocted over 80 years ago at the Cairo Shepherd's Hotel. The bartender at the hotel (and trained chemist), Joe Scialom, was working to develop something to help hungover World War II soldiers.

After some experimentation, he decided to combine bourbon, gin, lime juice, ginger beer, and bitters, with the hope of easing symptoms and helping the soldiers recover and be ready. Scialom's creation must have been effective; according to reporting from the time, soldiers put in requests for it to be sent to them on the battlefields. Despite its interesting history, the name just isn't clear and may even be offensive to some. It had an 80+ year run as a Suffering Bastard; maybe we should consider a more updated, modern moniker.

You're in a bustling, loud bar and you shout over the din: "Bartender, I'd like A Lonely Island Lost in the Middle of a Foggy Sea." Say what? Who wants to order a cocktail — or even try to remember its name — when it is so wordy? As you might be able to guess from the 11-word name, this is a tropical-inspired cocktail, conceived from Three Dots and a Dash, a Tiki bar in Chicago. The ingredient list features three different types of rum (Cruzan blackstrap rum, Old Port Deluxe matured rum, and Rhum J.M agricole blanc), pineapple juice, demerara syrup, lime juice, and cold brew coffee.

While this tropical drink's ingredient list may sound appealing, its wordy name could use some rewriting so it's easier to remember and get out in a few syllables instead of 15. Plenty of variations can still play with the "lonely island" portion of the name without including so many extraneous details.

We're not sure which is more disturbing, the name of this cocktail or its origins. The Monkey Gland cocktail's history traces back about 100 years ago to Paris, France, though there is some debate about who created it. Two men — Harry MacElhone and Frank Meier — both claim that they came up with the idea for the drink. MacElhone was the owner of Harry's New York Bar in Paris and Frank Meier was a bartender at the Ritz in Paris. What isn't up for debate is the reasoning behind the cocktail's name. It was named it after Russian scientist Dr. Serge Voronoff. If you haven't heard of Voronoff before, he transplanted testicles from monkeys onto senior Frenchmen because of his belief that the extra testosterone would enhance the vitality and life expectancy of these men.

Regardless of who created the cocktail, the name is enough to turn many off ordering one, let alone the reason behind the name. The cocktail is made using dry gin, orange juice, grenadine, and absinthe. There has to be a more fitting — and less barf-inducing — name for such a combination of ingredients. Does anyone really want to think about monkey testicles as they're sipping on a cocktail?

When you're looking to order a shot, you don't want the visual of hard cement being poured out of a truck. So, why would the idea of a Cement Mixer shot sound appealing? Cement Mixer shots are made using just two ingredients: Irish cream liqueur and lime juice. Add the Irish cream to the shot glass first, then pour lime juice over the back of a spoon so it sits over the Irish cream. The acidic lime juice will cause the creamy liqueur to start curdling. The longer the ingredients sit together, the more the liqueur will curdle and begin to take on a texture rivaling that of wet cement — hence the name.

While there actually is a logical reason behind the name of this shot, that doesn't mean that it can't be changed to something more appetizing. Perhaps with a verbal warning to be sure to take the shot promptly to avoid letting the ingredients solidify.